Always keeping it classy, guys.
Durrrrrrrrr
Shorts, or rather, Bloomers (The Man Repeller x PJK, similar here), Vest (Old Navy - old, similar here), Shirt (Forever 21, similar here and here), Necklaces (Dogeared), Bracelets (Nadri and Madewell), Rings (miscellaneous Ariella rings)
Sure, these billowy, barely-there bloomers could pass for lingerie, piquant with their familiarly silken trappings of sexytime, their dreamy undulations of form, their silhouette aflutter with flirtatious energy. (Too much?) But I assure you they're not. They're shorts. Perfectly suitable for out-of-the-house, public prancing and tomfoolery, much to my boyfriend's dismay.
My inherent need to flout aside, there are some places I would probably never wear these. The office for one—unless the office meant my bedroom where I could slip into these suckers, lazily sift through my emails, eating peanut butter out of the jar and wearing my favorite socks; church is another (I have precisely two occasions annually during which this predicament could present itself as something to even be considered), uhh, the grocery store is another—actually no, I would totally and happily wear these to the grocery store, much to my boyfriend's dismay—and lastly, I would probably never wear these to a funeral.
Why it took me nearly 3 months post-purchase to finally take these babies for a spin, I'll never know. Perhaps these are merely another attempt (of many) in my OH-MY-GOD-CARLEE-YOU'RE-STILL-TALKING-ABOUT-THIS?! fruitless vestiary pursuit to dress myself into thinking it's Summer. Waiting until late August to wear these, when everyone's already talking about Christmas (apparently?!) is maybe my way of ignoring the impending season, whilst cheekily (get it?) and efficiently aerating the lower half of my body, much to my boyfriend's dismay.
Or perhaps (and more likely) these underthings-turned-grocery-store-pants are simply another incarnation of my ridiculousness manifesting itself occasionally through my sartorial decisions. A vague attempt on my part to craft some kind of eccentricity through clothing, in order to distract everyone from the fact that I am in fact completely devoid of personality (to loosely quote Carrie Bradshaw, Season 2). But also, these shorts are just plain fabulous! And you should know that they also couldn't be more user-friendly. Never have I so swiftly and in one deft motion been able to don a single piece of clothing without incident or effort.
The best part is, it's just as quickly that you've put them on that you've already forgotten you're wearing them. (How liberating!) And I challenge you to find one warm-blooded soul that doesn't want to walk around outside feeling as if they aren't wearing any pants...other than maybe my boyfriend.
Why it took me nearly 3 months post-purchase to finally take these babies for a spin, I'll never know. Perhaps these are merely another attempt (of many) in my OH-MY-GOD-CARLEE-YOU'RE-STILL-TALKING-ABOUT-THIS?! fruitless vestiary pursuit to dress myself into thinking it's Summer. Waiting until late August to wear these, when everyone's already talking about Christmas (apparently?!) is maybe my way of ignoring the impending season, whilst cheekily (get it?) and efficiently aerating the lower half of my body, much to my boyfriend's dismay.
Or perhaps (and more likely) these underthings-turned-grocery-store-pants are simply another incarnation of my ridiculousness manifesting itself occasionally through my sartorial decisions. A vague attempt on my part to craft some kind of eccentricity through clothing, in order to distract everyone from the fact that I am in fact completely devoid of personality (to loosely quote Carrie Bradshaw, Season 2). But also, these shorts are just plain fabulous! And you should know that they also couldn't be more user-friendly. Never have I so swiftly and in one deft motion been able to don a single piece of clothing without incident or effort.
The best part is, it's just as quickly that you've put them on that you've already forgotten you're wearing them. (How liberating!) And I challenge you to find one warm-blooded soul that doesn't want to walk around outside feeling as if they aren't wearing any pants...other than maybe my boyfriend.
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